Nuno's Gifts

Dear Nuno,
You have now undressed even this name,
May you be free
As you rise
Free from sorrow,
Free from our attachments
Free from our pain, which is our individual responsibility
Free from our guilt
Free from our shoulds and shouldn’ts
Rights and wrongs
And all spaces in between what might have been
May we let go of the need to understand why
What, when and how your departure happened
And just hold its sacredness
In this silent embrace

May we release you
Into the Freedom you have always been
And may we hold and embrace you,
In your departure
At least with twice the Love with which we have received you

May our Gratitude
Our boundless Love
Be with you Eternally
As you are,
You are Free to Be!

Our heart is broken,
Wide Open

All seeds must break to bloom

You used to call me thunder.
You said I would strike and open space to truth and rootedness
Truth is, you reminded me sharply of the abysses I have known too well.
The difference is, you decided to step forward right where I chose to step back.
So the thunder I brought you was no more than the thunder I use on myself to bring me back from edgy spaces of overriding shadow and raw wilderness.
I respect this will of yours, of crossing through hell. Like Persephone you have been raped and restored as a healer into that burning darkness of the Soul within. I can feel the quest, the Spirit embrace and all of that tremendous multiplicity of space between wonder, revelation, pain, brokenness, loneliness, madness, oneness.
I can hear your piercing clarity, the way you saw through mirrors crushing our disguises and proof testing our bravery, our convictions, our core selves. That amazing arrogance and that extreme vulnerability that I saw in you as I see in me, and maybe in all of us. That unapologetic sense of self and the disappearance of self itself.
I can hear where it all became delusional, without ever loosing total sense, and that was, perhaps, the most deranging of it all. You were an invitation, a wide open one, to the spirit quest in all extremes, throwing us right into the centre of all forbidden questions.
I respect your choice to leave, because I strongly believe we always choose when to arrive in birth and when to leave in death, no matter by what means.
Did the wave embrace you? Did you embrace the wave? It doesn’t really matter, because the wave embraces you as you embrace the wave and that’s precisely where desolation and redemption hold each other and extinguish into Oneness. The ocean within the drop surrenders to the vast ocean of existence.
And as you came through holy water in birth so you returned home, gently carried by the waters of the Divine Mother.  
For many times, I have felt the invitation to surrender into that beautiful emptiness death offers, but unlike you, so far, I choose to live. Because I am in Love with this miracle, and of course Love will break us to open us wider. Just like you did. Just like you are still doing.
Each of us shall remember you through a different face, a different name, a different set of moments with you. Don’t ever hold on to us, let go of our memories, let us go.
We Love you with the sacred power to offer you Freedom, and joy, and the deepest gratitude, This Love is bigger than the heart itself. You know this, you are pulsing within infinity.
You are the thunder, you have outdone me.
We shall dance and roar in the open sky.
And we shall contemplate in silence the beauty of it All: this consciousness, this manifestation, beyond this and that.
Full circle Brother, Beloved
Space is our endless, Loving, Embrace

To Peter, Beloved Soul Companion
To see you burn and surrender in the absolute gift of yourself towards your brother has been and is an inspiration
It is an honour and a blessing to share this journey and this moment with you

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